When there is chaos all around you, how do you stay grounded? How do you maintain focus? And equally important, who should you focus on?
I can’t help but think that somewhere in the past, there was a woman who was just like me. Maybe she had the same cocoa-colored skin, the same kink in her hair with flecks of gray, the same fullness in her lips, and uneasiness in her eyes that hoped for a better tomorrow.
Maybe she worked on a cotton farm or was a cook in someone’s kitchen. Or maybe she was a domestic and made beds, and tended to other people’s children for a living, or was even a seamstress or maybe she couldn’t work outside the home at all.
I’m thinking maybe in the not too distant past she would daydream like me and stare out windows, big and small wanting the world to be safer for her sons and daughters. Thinking if she smiled enough, was kind enough, loved the Lord with all her heart that the world around her might – just might – change.
If I could tell her something, I would tell her that I know her heartache. I understand her pain, and while the craziness of the world may appear to limit her abilities because of how she looks and who they think she is, that she’s unlimited in the will of God.
I’ve been on my knees in prayer a lot in the past two weeks, desperate for answers, wanting to understand why there’s so much chaos in the world but slowly I changed the conversation with God. I’m not asking why anymore; I can’t. My mother wanted to know why my grandmother wanted to know why my great grandmother wanted to know why. I cannot ask why anymore.
I cannot ask why anymore.
I know now that to rise above the problems of this world my place is to fall on my knees in His presence. And when I rise, I do so with the full armor of God.